2008 and counting

I’ve been contemplating 2007 via pictures, and thinking about what to write in my “it’s a new year” post. Shall I make resolutions? Shall I consider them a lost cause? Shall I stick to hoping I can get our holiday decorations down in time for spring? Hmmm …

I’m leaning toward making resolutions. I am going to endeavor to not make this into an opportunity to overachieve, but that’s such an integral part of my personality I am already okay with failing that part of it. Instead of specific things, though, I’m going to look at areas of my life I think need enhancement or improvement – things that would make me less frustrated and more happy.

Technological barriers: I think of technology as sets of tools, and although I’ve picked up some and use them frequently, I’m at the point where I need to either put some decent time and energy into what I’m doing or accept my limitations. I don’t really accept limitations well, so I’ll be giving myself some lessons in things, specifically Illustrator and PHP. I need to stop being an “expert dabbler” in complicated things because that’s just ridiculous and in the end, defeating when you can’t quite do what you want to on your own.  I think doing this will give me a huge sense of relief and eliminate a lot of my frustrations.

Sense of accomplishment or completion: I really need more of this to feel better about my crafting in particular.  I get fidgety and move between projects a lot, but I think that’s not a great approach. I need to put my energy into finishing the projects that have been languishing. I think this will make me worry less about things I’m not doing that I think I “should” be doing (I hate the word “should”). I also think it will allow for more creativity eventually when I can move the “stale creativity” (old projects) out of my head space. For example, the granny square blanket I began in 2005. So, no more new projects until I’ve completed the old ones. Applies to all things, but particularly my crocheting and sewing.

Spend time on things that are important to me: I get caught up pretty easily in minutiae & pointless activities (or sometimes endless reruns of Law and Order – you know how they start the next episode before the first is really done? So annoying.) and end up not doing the things that are really important to me, which leaves me feeling like the days are passing swiftly in an endless sea of repetitive nothingness. This is depressing.  I should stop doing this.

Use more paper: No no, just kidding. This is an odd one, but it really means I want to write and draw more.   It means I want more sort of “raw” self-expression.  This is the antithesis to the finishing projects one above, and is all about not perfecting things, but just sort of sketching or doodling or playing with ideas and colors and techniques without needing to feel as though I have to finish something, or perfect it, or even see it through to some illogical end.  I need to change up what I’m thinking about, and get my ideas out and into some kind of life, even if I look back at my 3-headed monster and shake my head in bewilderment later.

Be more thoughtful and intentional:  Relatedly, I think the big projects I undertake this year should be few and very carefully chosen and most importantly – achievable.  If I want a project, I think I ought to consider taking on small projects instead that have short life spans.  It is part of the Crafter by Night (and weekends) problem that I must consider what I do and how I do it more carefully, and put my time to better use lest I feel as though I can’t accomplish anything and am just trying to get by.  I have a lot of ideas, lots of energy, but … I can’t not sleep.

I hope with these resolutions that I will find that I can achieve my aim:  to foster my  creativity, cut down on being overwhelmed, and do things that give me joy.  You know what?  I really hope too that I don’t sound like a new-age self-help book, but I fear that I do.  I guess we’ll see!!

Handmade Consortium

I’m tempted to think that “consortium” sounds slightly shady. I don’t know why. I attended consortiums, or perhaps was in a consortium, when in grad school, I can’t remember which, and it seemed to involve quantities of kosher vegan food (I ate a lot of kosher vegan food in school) and occasionally cheap wine.

But this is not that consortium, and I digress. This is the Consortium that runs the Buy Handmade Pledge, and they emailed me a couple days ago to tell me that they were past the 10,000 mark – that is, more than 10,000 people have taken the pledge. I was, I believe, No. 639.

But also, there was an interesting article in the New York Times Magazine about the Pledge, which morphed into musings about Etsy (which has apparently topped 1,000,000 sales now), a few mentions of Craft and some confused contemplating of the whole craft movement and how it ought to be characterized. Hehe. I think it is fabulously interesting to see people who are not really connected with craft peek into this “movement” as it were and try to figure what’s going on.

I’ll also point you to the Flickr pool that the Consortium made of people creatively depicting their Handmade pledges. Some pretty interesting stuff in there, like this:

from Meu Pintinho Coloridinho aka Carola Rodrigues

Houston and other stories …

I didn’t learn to sew when I was younger.  My mom’s an excellent seamstress, but she’s not a bit fan of having to sew if she doesn’t have to.  I think she had to sew too much growing up for 4-H and all that.  So basically, it’s another case where the crafting skips a generation.  Happens a lot with crafting.

(M. D. Anderson Cancer Center, Medical Center)

My grandmother is another sewer.  I can’t even begin to tell you how much she’s sewn in her life.  I imagine she can’t tell you either.  I’m curious whether she enjoys it.  After decades sewing, is it something you do for enjoyment?  She had to sew when she was younger, and a farm wife – all the clothes for self and kids.  When you have to do something like that, does it stop being fun?

(Sail art display, Texas Children’s Hospital, Medical Center.  I used to work around the corner.)

I started crafting because I wanted to.  I was curious.  I thought that sewing machines were some of the niftiest machines in the world.  I used to take yarn and wrap it around the knobs on my dresser in imitation of winding the thread on the machine to adjust the tension.  I started poking myself with needles when I was about 7.

(the ex-Crowne Plaza Hotel Medical Center, just imploded on Sunday) 

I broke the needle on my mom’s sewing machine when I was very young, and I thought I’d broken the whole machine.  I didn’t tell her I’d been responsible for 20 years, well after I’d learned it really wasn’t such a big deal (hi mom!).

(Memorial Hermann Hospital, Medical Center)

It took me years to want to do anything with yarn.  I had to move north where there are actually seasons in order to get interested.  I had sweaters growing up that I never touched.  Why?  When it’s 80 degrees in January, your sweaters never come out.  I’m still not sure why I want to make them.  But I have a lot of scarves I don’t wear now.

(St. Paul’s Methodist Church)

I was in Arkansas when I really got a huge interest in crafting.  Pickles Gap.  Walked into a random store on a random road trip that didn’t go as I expected.  The woman who ran the shop was a weaver.  She also made clear lemon soap.  I immediately decided I wanted to make soap.  I went home and started.

(Random building, Main Street)

I’m not sure what it was about that shop.  Maybe it was being in the middle of nowhere.  Maybe it was the shop itself.  Maybe the artist, and all the goods in her shop that she’d made.  Maybe I was just ready to start thinking about something else, to figure out a little more about myself, and it just clicked that day.

(the ridiculous above-ground single-line train-based transit system)

I’m not sure who all has my other grandmother’s crochet items.  I have a purple dress she made.  Tiny Barbie-sized dress, that is.  She made very intricate things.  I have no idea where I’ve stuck that dress right now.  I had it two moves ago, then I put it somewhere “that made sense and was safe” and now I can’t figure out where that was.   Brilliant.

(downtown – the tall Texaco building in the center)

I’m glad I learned to crochet instead of knit.  I’m really not interested in making garments.   I have never really been interested in making garments – knit, crochet, sew, whatever.  I make other things.  Crochet I find more interesting because of the intricacy of a lot of the patterns.  It’s hard for me to believe it does that sometimes.

(apartment building and palm on Montrose near the University of St. Thomas)

When I was growing up I was not sure I was creative.  I knew a lot of creative, talented people.  I mean really creative and talented.  People who went on to be studio art majors in college.  People who are artists for a living.  Lots of writers.  Musicians.  Even if it’s not professional, they’re still all ridiculously creative.  I struggled for a long time feeling like I was faking it trying to create things.

(the once-”notorious” corner of Westheimer and Montrose)

I remember sitting down and making light switch covers.  I cut the balsa wood – which everyone was sure would burn down the house – myself.  The balsa still hasn’t burned.  I painted it, covered them with an acrylic finish for protection.  Years later the acrylic has yellowed, which still really pisses me off.  I really liked all those tiny little paintings I did.  Hours of enjoyment.

(live oak tree in front of the Hotel Derek at Westheimer and 610)

I had a really prolific period when I was recovering from spinal surgery.  Only because I was so incredibly bored with lying there for weeks on end.  Incredibly bored.  If only I’d known how to crochet then.

(the Williams Tower at the Galleria)

One of my favorite things to do is make wreaths.  I’m not very good at it, but I like wreaths and bows.  I think that’s my mom.  She has one (or two) for every season.  She also has too many Santas.

(one of the many pines of the area against an evening sky)

99% of my crafting is self-taught.  I should also say that 99% of my everything is self-taught.  My computer knowledge, my fundraising, my crafting, and in most cases my writing style.  Even most of my research knowledge I did by striking out on my own, to the irritation of professors in three states.  The only thing I really know as a result of someone else is music – I took years of piano and clarinet lessons.  I played the piano for 14+ years.  I still play sometimes, because I got a real job and could afford a keyboard.

(this is suburbia)

I think that the most interesting part of being alive is learning.  It’s why I logged over 8 years in college.  It’s why I learned any crafting at all.  It’s why I look for new recipes every day even though I have hundreds in memory.  It’s why I’m on my 4th or so profession.  It’s why I keep moving.  I don’t stay still.  I can’t.

(red berries bloom in November and December)