The Post I Didn’t Want to Write
I’ve been avoiding my blog, the phone, people, email … for a couple of weeks now. Every time I have to tell someone that my puppy Audrey passed away, it just makes it a little bit more real, and even though it’s been a week and a half, I haven’t quite gotten past the point where I hope someone will tell me it’s all a big mistake, a joke in terribly poor taste, and that she is coming home soon.
It’s not a joke, though, her kidneys just didn’t want to work anymore. Back in December when she first got sick we had hoped it was an infection or Addison’s maybe, something we could fix, because she was just 9 years old in June. But it was the havoc that age wreaks, and age has a terribly uncompromising inevitability. For Jeff and I it’s been a long, sad, difficult year and a half of caring for sick animals, balancing good medical care with their quality of life, and finally making the decision about letting them go.
We cherished the 8 years and 9 months we had with Audrey. Audrey taught me much about what’s important in life, and what isn’t. She brought immense joy and exuberance to everything she did and was full of life and mischief every day. Her greatest gift was her limitless capacity to love. I miss her terribly.
11 Comments
feel free to leave a few words of your own...MrPuffy — Sun Aug 30, 2009 at 4:50 pm (link)I’m so so very sorry. Such a difficult thing. I understand what you mean about talking about it making it seem more real. Several weeks ago Mr Puffy was diagnosed with cancer of the bladder and because the medications have helped so much I can almost forget. But, not really.
Audry was a sweet little dog who will be remembered and missed by those who knew her.
Lee — Mon Aug 31, 2009 at 6:37 am (link)Oh…such sad news. She must have been a very special pet.
Melissa — Mon Aug 31, 2009 at 12:28 pm (link)Audrey was such a wonderful, sweet, expressive dog … I know how hard it must have been to say goodbye. I’ll really miss her too.
I’m so very sorry, and glad I got to give you and J big hugs in person.
Melissa — Mon Aug 31, 2009 at 12:30 pm (link)And that sweet picture of her is making me cry. I’ll miss her very much.
Paula Frey — Mon Aug 31, 2009 at 4:49 pm (link)Audrey was what every pet parent hopes for: a true joy and a bundle of furry love.
Miriam — Wed Sep 2, 2009 at 7:58 pm (link)Claudia – I’m so sorry to hear about Mr Puffy, how much you love him is evident in the way you talk about him. It’s always so hard to let go of those wonderful little beings that grace our lives for a time.
Thanks everyone for your sweet notes. (watery smile)
Anna — Thu Sep 3, 2009 at 5:51 am (link)I’m so sorry about Audrey; I’m sure she had a good life with you too.
“But some animals, like some men, leave a trail of glory behind them. They give their spirit to the place where they have lived, and remain forever a part of the rocks and streams and the wind and sky.”
– Marguerite Henry (Brighty of the Grand Canyon)
Jennifer — Fri Sep 4, 2009 at 5:09 pm (link)I hate to admit this but I was avoiding this site for this very reason. But we can’t stick our heads in the sand forever, unfortunately. There are a few things you should ask yourself everyday. By doing this you will eventually get your heart to know what your mind already does. At least in time. 1) Did she have a good life? Absolutely. 2) Was she loved well by many? Most definitely. 3) Will she remain in our hearts forever? Totally. 4) Was her life as enriched by us, as much as ours was by her? A simple yes. 5) Would have have left her at the store, knowing what you know now, that she would only be in ours live for such a short time? Seriously doubtful. Finally, 6) would you do it all over again? Absolutely. She was well loved and will be most definitely missed by all those who knew her. You’re in my thoughts and if there is anything I can do to make things easier let me know.
Jenna Z — Thu Sep 10, 2009 at 3:40 pm (link)Oh dear, Miriam, I hope my belated comment doesn’t bring up sad feelings. But I wanted you to know my thoughts are with you, it is a terrible thing to go through, loosing a pet. And it’s comforting (at least to me) to know others understand that pain, because there are a lot of people out there that don’t. And what an even bigger loss for them, to not know the love a pet brings! (Can you tell I used to have a terrible boss who made me feel so stupid and dumb and about 6 inches tall when I lost a pet and got upset?)
Miriam — Fri Sep 11, 2009 at 1:46 pm (link)It is good to know others are attached to their animal friends the same way that Jeff and I are. We’ve encountered a lot of disbelief and even amusement! (even from a couple of pet owners) at our efforts to make her well and our pain when we lost her. It’s hard to believe, but there are people that are that … I don’t even know the adjective I want, but it’s not flattering. Good for us, that we have hearts!
